A Corinthian Cracked Pot

Keenly aware of my shortcomings, I begin today's post with a fitting parable from India.

In the village, water for everyday use is drawn from a well that is some way away from the villagers’ living areas. One day, a man went down to the well to draw water like he always does everyday. He balances a pole on his shoulders and there are two large pots in which he carries the water home with. One of the pots had a crack in it, and while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master’s house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.  For a full two years this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water in his master’s house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, perfect to the end for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.  After two years of what it perceived to be a bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself, and I want to apologize to you.” “Why?” asked the bearer. “What are you ashamed of?” “I have been able, for these past two years, to deliver only half my load because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your masters house. Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work, and you don’t get full value from your efforts.” The pot said.  The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot, and in his compassion he said, “As we return to the masters house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path.” Indeed, as they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers on the side of the path, and this cheered it some. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again the Pot apologized to the bearer for its failure. The bearer said to the pot, “Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of your path, but not on the other pots side? That’s because I have always known about your flaw, and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back from the stream, you’ve watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my masters table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”

I am like that cracked pot.  I am no great person, in fact there is more than one crack in me.  I make wrong choices, say and do the wrong things and yet God still does great things through me. I often stand in awe of the fact that God chooses to use me, in the ways that He does.  I consider myself blessed and privileged to be able to serve Him and be used by Him to serve others, in spite of or perhaps because of my weaknesses. There is no way I could have become who I am or achieved what I have without God working in and through me.

All through the Old Testament, the theme of God using the weak things of the world to fulfill His purposes is evident, with the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ being the culmination. That theme continues to permeate the New Testament and arguably no where is this theme more present than in Paul’s 2nd letter to the Corinthians. Paul clearly declares that God’s glory is magnified in the weakness of His disciples and their reliance upon the Father. Just as Christ became a servant all the way to the cross, so to should the disciples of Christ, becomes less so that God Himself becomes more.

This is a beautiful letter that radiates God’s glory through the authenticity and vulnerability of His servant and apostle Paul. I love the authenticity that is revealed as we see Paul’s anxiety rise as he anticipates the response to the letter of rebuke he sent.  "When we arrived in Macedonia province, we couldn't settle down. The fights in the church and the fears in our hearts kept us on pins and needles. We couldn't relax because we didn't know how it would turn out." [7:5] Then the struggle between the heart that does not want to hurt, the humanity that desires acceptance and the call to obedience and doing what in the long-run will glorify God is illustrated wonderfully in Paul’s words “Even if I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it. Though I did regret it – I see that my letter hurt you, but only for a little while – yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance” [7:8-9] My mind in reading this immediately goes to the parent who knows that discipline is necessary in order to raise the child in the ways in which they must follow, but at the same time is broken hearted in having to do it and so says “this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you”

The openness of Paul in revealing his broken humanity serves as a wonderful example for the reader. As his loneliness, discouragement and suffering bleed across the pages, we witness at the same time strength of Faith, a trust in Hope and reliance in God that is as equally authentic and therefore believable. “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not abandoned; struck down but nor destroyed” [4:8-9] “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all” [4:16-17] The truth of Paul’s reality provides us perspective, that yes we too will suffer but there is a purpose there is a plan and it is all to the glory of God for He is in control.

It is in a strange way encouraging knowing that Paul himself struggled and was burdened with a thorn in the flesh, and fitting that we never know what that thorn is. It is encouraging because here we read of a great man of God, a pillar of the faith, who himself was not perfect, nor without struggle, pain, weakness or brokenness, he is revealed in this letter, to suffer in many of the same ways we all do. It is fitting that we do not learn what the thorn in His flesh was, because then each of us can relate to Paul, and take comfort in the same words of God that brought him comfort “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 

Like Paul, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses.  I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become. 

I am Pro-Life

I did not have a chance to watch the Superbowl.  I was cheering for the saints though, the New Orleans Saints and the saints that joined me on Sunday.  Not only did I miss the Superbowl but also all the entertaining commercials.  I saw this morning for the first time, Focus on the Family's Tim Tebow Superbowl Ad.

There has been a lot of controversy over this commercial which I personally think is unwarranted  The commercial  did what I think is appropriate for Christians to do.  Present what they stand-for without attacking what they stand against. It was a pro-life message verses an an anti-choice one.

I'm Pro Life and I advocate Pro Life. God is certainly Pro Life!  He created life - "God created man in his image; in the divine image he created him; male and female he created them" ~Genesis 1:27.  He gives life - "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." ~John 10:10.  It breaks his heart when we take life from anyone, for any reasons. "Thou shall not kill" ~ Exodus 20:13 "Jesus replied, 'Do not murder,'" ~ Matthew 19:18.  This being said, I do not spend my time fighting against pro-choice. God has given us all free will. While we are commanded and advised to not do certain things, we are not prevented from doing them. God guides us and He informs us of the consequences of our choices good and bad. The consequences for not following His commands or advice, both temporally and eternally will be devastating for all involved but ultimately God still leaves the decision to the individual. While I am a strong pro-life proponent, I recognize that people have a choice both because it is legal and because God has given us free will. Make it illegal and people will still have a choice, though the consequences of an ungodly decision could be even more devastating. 

I am not God and I certainly have no desire to play God, instead, I want to point people towards Him.  I want to be an advocate for the things of God. I want to be able to build relationships and present the truth in love, advising them of the possible, probable and definite consequences of any decision so that they can make the right choice, the Godly choice. I realize that in the end the choice is theirs to make - theirs to live with, but believe this is the best chance I have to influence anyone.

My question is where are the Christians in the lives of  people before they find themselves lost in the darkness of confusion and hopelessness looking for a way out?  I suggest that more lives would be saved, more women would choose life if we spent more of our time coming alongside people, building relationships, providing them support and pointing them towards the hope they need, to believe that they can get through anything.  The Tim Tebow story is evidence of this - it was their relationship with God and trust in them that gave them the strength to make the decision they did.  I would love to know what percentage of people who stand with picket signs, fill-out petitions, and lobby government, spend as much or more time working in crisis pregnancy care centers, mentor young women struggling with self-esteem and promiscuity.  How many are interested in ministering to those who make the difficult decision amongst confusion and feelings of hopelessness and need healing?

If God will not force someone to make the right decision, what makes us believe that we could do so.  What we can do is reach out to those among us, and lead them to the Saviour.  Trusting that He will help them to make the right choice, saving perhaps not only 1 life but 2. We need to spend less time focused on fighting against the issue and more time focusing on people, building relationships, extending the same grace, mercy and love that was extended to us by our Heavenly Father. Here is what I know to be true - if people are brought to a place where they choose God - then they will choose life!

Nehemiah - A Lesson in Leadership & Revival

I stepped out of the office this afternoon, to peak in on the ladies bible study.  I was curious what they were studying, and learned they were going through the book of Nehemiah. I decided that I would reacquaint myself with that book, the following is what I surmised.

The book of Nehemiah is a continuation of the book of Ezra, in fact originally it was all one book. It is a story of Jerusalem's restoration and renewal resulting in revival.  I consistently hear the cries and prayers for revival and I, as much as anyone desire to see that come to fruition. The conclusion of the book of Ezra demonstrates that revival is a result of the convicting of the spirit, through the remembrance of both God’s grace and justice, which results in a commitment to worship, confession, repentance and resolve to serve the one true God. 

While the books of Ezra and Nehemiah can be used as a case study in revival, the book of Nehemiah also serves as a wonderful example of  leadership.  Nehemiah himself, was a man of integrity, courage, and boldness yet at the same time tenderness and prayer.

Nehemiah’s heart is burdened with the responsibility of rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem and seeing it's people restored.. The first thing Nehemiah does with this burden is to take it to the Lord in prayer, seeking His will, guidance and direction. He did not act abruptly or rashly but waited, months for God to provide an opportunity for him to proceed. Nehemiah faced opposition and defamation and yet he pressed on and found strength in the Lord to complete the task he was called to. ~A leader of prayer & patience

One of the things that struck me initially in the book of Nehemiah was his practice of praying the word and promises of God as evident in verse 1:8-10. Praying the promises of God is not something I have done regularly as part of my prayer, but as result of reading this, I am reminded to make it a more regular prayer practice. The overall form of Nehemiah’s prayer documented in verse 1:5-11, stood out for me, not sure why it was, but I was attentive to the elements included, such as addressing the nature of God, confessing to God, praying the word and promises of God. I found it a very enlightening and endearing prayer. ~A leader of prayer & confession

I loved what Nehemiah is quoted as saying in verse 2:2 “I was very much afraid, but I said to the king…” emphasis on the "but".  Though fear could have held him back he pressed onwards, he was humble and authentic in documenting his fear, and thus giving God the glory. ~ A leader with Boldness & Courage

I loved that Nehemiah continually sought God’s leadership in his life and efforts.A man of prayer, trusting in God, wanting to ensure he is doing God’s will, Nehemiah prayed to God for direction as he stood before the king, before answering his question. "The king said to me, "What is it you want?" Then I prayed to the God of heaven," ~2:4 Yet though he was a man of prayer, Nehemiah was also a man of preparation, he played His part as evident in verse 4:9, where yes, he indeed prayed but he also took responsible action by placing a “…guard day and night to meet this threat”. It happens perhaps too easily and too often, that as Christians we fall into a pattern of prayer, without taking the responsibility of being a people of preparation and action. When we are left wondering why it is that God has not moved among us, or provided for us, perhaps we need to evaluate if we were prepared to accomplish what God had for us to do,or maybe we are praying for God to act, when in fact God is calling us to move, to get off our knees and do that which he has provided and prepared us to do. I love the balance that Nehemiah presents as a man of God – a leader of both prayer and dependence on God, but action and responsibility as well.

Though Nehemiah was mocked and ridiculed, though he faced false accusation and criticism he refused to be discouraged, he went to God in prayer and he continued to rebuild the wall, and he did so with all his heart.

Nehemiah was a leader who led by example, he was not above the people, but was right there alongside them, working with them, in the thick of the labour, working as hard if not harder than each man to ensure the work was completed. [4:23] When Nehemiah recognized a problem, he did not complain about it or give it to another to address, he took it upon himself. Take for example the exacting of usury by the nobles and officials, before even addressing the perpetrators, he first assisted the victims by “…lending the people money and grain” and then sought resolution and restitution. Nehemiah also focuses on community. The cooperative work of the returned exiles made it possible for them to come together and form a tight community. ~ ~ A tender leader with integrity

Like Ezra, Nehemiah also focuses on the fact that Scripture is the driving force that brings the exiles back to the Lord, particularly the Law of Moses. The importance of the word of the law, and obedience to God’s word is again imperative for revival. If we want revival in our own hearts, churches and communities I would suggest we would do well to return to the word of the Lord – to teaching God’s word, making it clear and giving the meaning so that the people could understand what was being read. I have often heard it said, especially by my generation and those younger than I, that they are no longer taught the word of the Lord, the fear of the Lord. Instead it has become a self-help book of divine proportions. As a matter of fact, I just recently had someone tell me that the reason they attend a Christadelphian bible study is because though they do not agree with the doctrine, and attend a mainline church, it is the only place they have found a true, deep study of God’s word.

If one was to document a formula for leadership, it could be taken straight from the pages of Nehemiah. While the formula for revival based on the evidence of scripture, at least from the Ezra-Nehemiah experience, would include conviction of disobedience based on the teaching of God’s word, a confession of sin, an admission of God’s sovereignty, faithfulness and righteous justice, a repentance from sin, a covenant to be set-apart as God’s people to do God’s will, a dedication of our lives to God celebrated with rejoicing and praise to God for his mercy, grace and goodness. Revival is a result of more than just prayer - it requires our repentance and action - let us be and train up leaders like Nehemiah who will guide us to this end.

I'd Rather Risk

"There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, "Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams." Then they put the box away and bring it out once in a while to look in it, and yep they're still there." ~ Erma Bombeck

I've been thinking a lot today.  Actually I have been thinking a lot over the last year, I'm growing weary of thinking, I am ready for action.  The song RISK by Paul Brandt has been playing in my mind, probably as a subconscious push.   As I type this, I am laughing out loud, because coincidentally the conclusion of the episode of  "House" I'm watching,  is all about taking risks.  It illustrates the point that when we take risks, to do what we know is right, we unleash greatness. This is where I sit, thinking and wondering, about what, when and how to risk in order to fulfill the dreams God has placed in my heart. "Our truest life is when we are in our dreams awake" ~Henry David Thoreau

I've been looking in scripture, and know that I can not bury this passion or the gifts that God has given me.  "Great gifts mean great responsibilities; greater gifts, greater responsibilities!" ~ Luke 12:48.  In fact God does not want us to play it safe, this does not bring Him the honour He is due, help others or even leave us satisfied.  He wants us to trust Him and jump in with both feet in order to achieve all the God placed dreams in our heart. Jesus' parable of the talents found in Matthew 25:14-30 is evidence of this: "It's also like a man going off on an extended trip. He called his servants together and delegated responsibilities. To one he gave five thousand dollars, to another two thousand, to a third one thousand, depending on their abilities. Then he left. Right off, the first servant went to work and doubled his master's investment. The second did the same. But the man with the single thousand dug a hole and carefully buried his master's money. "After a long absence, the master of those three servants came back and settled up with them. The one given five thousand dollars showed him how he had doubled his investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.' "The servant with the two thousand showed how he also had doubled his master's investment. His master commended him: 'Good work! You did your job well. From now on be my partner.' "The servant given one thousand said, 'Master, I know you have high standards and hate careless ways, that you demand the best and make no allowances for error. I was afraid I might disappoint you, so I found a good hiding place and secured your money. Here it is, safe and sound down to the last cent.' "The master was furious. 'That's a terrible way to live! It's criminal to live cautiously like that! If you knew I was after the best, why did you do less than the least? The least you could have done would have been to invest the sum with the bankers, where at least I would have gotten a little interest. "'Take the thousand and give it to the one who risked the most. And get rid of this "play-it-safe" who won't go out on a limb. Throw him out into utter darkness.'

C.S. Lewis said that too often we're like children who settle for playing in the mud puddles when the beauty and immensity of the ocean are just a few feet away.  I want out of the puddles and into the ocean. Everyday that I do not take a step closer to the edge of the cliff, the more my spirit grows discontented.  The more I risk mediocrity. God created us to take risks.  Risks however are different than a gamble.  Risks are well discerned where a gamble is reckless.  I am not afraid to risk it all - where I am paralyzed at the moment is discerning where I am meant to invest. I do not have delusions of grandeur, but I do know we are all meant for greatness.  Ephesians 3:20 "God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!" While I have a pretty good idea of the areas I am gifted and the ways God can use me, I have not yet confirmed where my proverbial jumping off point is. So I wait and pray and prepare and serve as best I can where I am - till I jump off the cliff and find myself soaring above the horizon of mediocrity on the wings of eagles.

So I end this post the same way I began with the lyrics of RISK playing in the background of my mind.

I’d rather stand on the edge of a cliff, And hang my toes over a bit, And then jump when they dare me. Even if it scares me and I get hurt. I’d rather build my wings on the way down, Do my best not to fall to the ground and than laugh at my mistakes, ‘cause there only lessons I’ll learn I’d rather burn with desire deep in my soul, And love like a fire that’s out of control, and laugh and dance and fall and chance and kiss. I’d rather live my whole life with a sense of abandon, Squeeze every drop out, no matter what happens. And not wonder what I've missed, I’d rather risk. Well I guess I could just play it safe and forget about love, hope and faith, with my eye on the shore line, keeping my boat tied and staying home, ohhh but I’ll never discover new land by keeping my feet on the sand No I’d rather set sail and get carried away by the storm. Ohhh live, and love and laugh and dance and fall and chance and kiss - I’d rather risk 

A Nostalgic Thing

15.5 hours later I can say that it was an overly productive and good day, nothing to complain about. In fact I still stand in awe of the incredible opportunity I have to serve in ministry.  I was whelmed with nostalgic feelings, as I got out of my car, on this brisk, but bright sun glistened morning, and walked up to the church doors.  I reminisced of early spring days when I was younger and I'd watch as elderly couples and young family's dressed up in their Sunday best, would walk to church, the sound of bells ringing in the air.  Now I have the uber blessing of serving those people.  I don't think it will ever get old.

I spent the early morning preparing for the Secret Sister potluck luncheon, with everything  prepared I slipped into a pew and sang my heart out to God.  It was an incredible time of worship, and while I know it is all about giving back to God, it left me restored and refueled for the rest of my day.

After facilitating and cleaning up from the Secret Sister potluck, I prepared supper for the college & careers group, just in time to get the sound set-up and photocopies of the music for our Sunday evening service ready for our Breakthru team who was coming in to practice.  Then it was time for College & Careers, we all enjoyed a great meal together, and a whole lot of laughs.  At 8:30pm, off we went to praise and power for some more amazing worship, where some of us, myself included, sang so loud we drowned out the crowd.  It was great.

As we were waiting for the band to begin, I quoted a verse to a friend "Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God"  ~Romans 10:17.  The person in front of us, a university student, turned around and said "I like that - I mean I like that verse - My pastor just preached on that this morning"  So I thought I would reflect on that briefly for my blog today.

Romans 10:17 - My experience with this verse, brings back those nostalgic feelings.  I've always had a knowledge of God,  and so from a n early age I was searching for answers. Exploring different religions and spiritual systems. My faith was cemented when I heard the Gospel, which quickened my heart as God spoke to me, in essence saying I am who you were waiting for, what you were missing.  All those questions you had I am the answer. Then when my experiences, aligned with the word of God, when His promises outlined in the Bible proved true to me, my faith increased. The more I am in His word, the more I understand His ways in our world and the more my faith grows. Faith came by hearing and hearing by the word of God.

To this day, my faith increases with every page I seek to understand of God's word.  I am never left disillusioned, or led astray, never given any reason to doubt, in fact any doubts are eased as I find answers and truth in the word of God.  If you are crying out to God for more faith, diligently make use of the Bible, and your cries will not go unanswered.

"Faith comes by the Word of God, and the Word of God leads us more and more to rest in, follow, and love the Lord Jesus Christ, and to trust His obedience unto death for our righteousness, salvation, and eternal life. Don’t expect one without the other."

Levels of Grey

I realized that I had in an earlier post unwittingly started what would be my next poetry slam.  So I took those first few lines and ran with it. I am trying purposely to balance grace with truth (forgiveness slam was all about grace).  However I can only write what comes to me and this is what came to me... 

Levels of Grey
Things don't seem to be as black and white as they were back in the day.  We live in a society crumbling in a torrent of moral decay.  When it comes to doing right, there are now all these levels of grey.  I don't get it, I can't understand, why it is that we continue, to despise our fellow man.  With more opportunity to come together, we're still falling apart, not due to a lack of knowledge or opportunity but a failing of the heart.  The most frustrating thing is who do you blame, how do you fix a problem you can't even name?

Nobody stays together anymore, husbands and wives walking out the door. Marriage is rarely seen as a sacred trust, simply a joke, or for some, a quick fix for lust.  A world where rules like promises are made to be broken, vows that are made but should never have been spoken. Lies and gossip are the name of the game, in trying to get ahead it doesn't matter who you maim or defame.  Integrity? Are you kidding me?  Even Martha Stewart got caught taking a little off the top, it seems there aren't to many people left, that can't be bought.  Everybody's looking to make a quick buck, forget working hard, let it all roll, take a chance on luck. The pain that we cause is not so overt, we create instead, a subtle kind of hurt, with the words that we say, and those that we don't, with the those we ignore and those we promote. Our heaven on earth is never gonna come, if we keep on hurting, ignoring and judging everyone. 

I wish sometimes that we didn't have the money to ease our conscience, using it to make up for the fact that we choose to keep our distance.  Going to church every week, tossing a twenty in the plate, thinking that this enough to get us through the heavenly gate.  What baffles me most of all, is how Oprah and Ellen can get people en mass to  answer the call, to help those in need, to step forward and serve, while those of us with the power of God, too often sit on the sidelines and observe.  A world desperate for the spiritual truth that will end their strife, are more drawn to lost symbols, a new earth, and the secret, rather than, the Way, the Truth and the Life. Forgive us Father for we know not what we do, too focused on ourselves, instead of pointing others towards You.  

I realize how far we are from who we need to be, but I am trusting in God's forgiveness and power to transform you and me. We're all a work in progress, so search our hearts Oh God, reveal any unclean way in us, so that we can lead and be led to the promised land like Moses.

I am not saying that there are no areas of grey, for certain there are choices that may, not be so black and white, but we've got to try and get it right.  We need to look at the results of all that we've been choosing and realize that it's more than just our way of life that we risk losing. Our souls are crying out for a better way, knowing there is gonna come a day, when God will wipe every tear away.
 
We're all meant to live a greater existence, but that means setting aside our vengeance, listening to our conscience, and accepting that Christ has already served our sentence. His Kingdom will not come, until we surrender our lives to the one, who paid the cost on the cross, giving up his own life, to seek and save the lost.

Perfected in Love

I am of the belief that God would not call us to love Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength and love our neighbour as our self if it were not possible.  We are commanded to be Holy as He is Holy not as a simple appeal but a command, an attainable reality, God helping us.  “For as long as love takes up the whole heart, what room is there for sin therein?”

I long to see the same religion established in the world that Reverend John Wesley sought and God calls us to “a religion of love, joy and peace, having its seat in the inmost soul, but ever showing itself by its fruits, continually springing forth not only in all innocence – for love worketh no ill to his neighbour – but likewise in every kind of beneficence, spreading virtue and happiness all around it.

With denominations debating doctrines of little eternal importance, Wesley points out that "there is a better religion to be attained, a religion worthy of God that gave it.  And this we conceive to be no other than love: the love of God and of all mankind; the loving God with all our heart and soul and strength, as having first loved us, as the fountain of all the good we have received and of all we ever hope to enjoy; and the loving every soul which God hath made, every man on earth, as our own soul.  This love we believe to be the medicine of life, the never-failing remedy for all the evils of a disordered world, for all the miseries and vices of men.  Wherever this is, there are virtue and happiness going hand in hand.  There is humbleness of mind, gentleness, long-suffering, the whole image of God, and, at the same time, a peace that passeth all understanding and joy unspeakable and full of glory”

Being perfected in love is what I strive for, God helping me, it is the focus of my faith, centered on Christ! Wesley has defined this, the pursuit of Christian Perfection as “Nothing higher and nothing lower than this: the pure love of God and man – the loving God with all our heart and soul and our neighbour as ourselves.  It is love governing the heart and life, running through all our tempers, words and actions” LOVE – “the highest gift of God – humble, gentle, patient love.”

My faith is summised by the the verses in Matthew 22: 36-39, "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" All too often we complicate the gospel, our legalism and manufactured doctrines getting in the way of what God wants to do, sometimes pushing people further away from God’s truth than drawing them nearer.   “The more care should we take to keep the simple, scriptural account continually in our eye: pure love reigning alone in our heart and life.  This is the whole of scriptural perfection.”  If only we were more conscious of doing just this, of allowing pure love to reign alone in our heart and life, to guide our decisions and motives.

Being perfected in love does not mean that we are not liable to mistake in practice as well as in judgement, but that, this is not sin if love is the principle of the action. Wesley attests that this does not exclude us from the need for a mediator/saviour but quite the contrary that as a result we are totally dependant upon Christ. “As the branch cannot bear fruit itself, except it abide in the vine, no more can ye except ye abide in me…Without,” or separate from, “me ye can do nothing”

If we have not first experienced the perfect and unconditional love of Christ we can never expect to be able to love God and others perfectly or perhaps even well.

Shane Claiborne wrote in Irresistable revolution that "we need converts in the best sense of the word, people who are marked by the renewing of their minds and imagination, who no longer conform to the pattern that is destroying our world.  Otherwise, we have believers, and believers are a dime a dozen now a days."  I submit that we need people marked most by the renewing of their hearts.  As we strive to fulfill the greastest commandment to love God and others we will become more than just believers but a people who believe so much in another way and another world that we cannot help but begin enacting it now.

I AM NOT but I AM

I spent the last hour and a half at a Hot Yoga class. No praying, no chanting, no bowing - no talking - just 26 moves, worked out in a 30+ degree room designed to destroy you in the best way possible. I came home feeling wonderfully spent, in a shirt that you could ring out.  I have now attended this class twice, and each time I am joyously reminded of who I am.

That being said, I am also painfully reminded that I am not as good as I once was, shoot, at this point I can not even claim to be as good once as I ever was.  I am more out of shape than ever, not as flexible, not as much endurance but more girth!  I blame the decline on a series of unfortunate injuries including a severed ACL and torn Meniscus, followed up by the dislocation of each of my shoulders and most recently the tearing of the major ligaments/tendons in my left ankle. If I was in a differnt place in my life this would have been enough to literally destroy me.  See my identity growing up was found in athletics.  So much so, that I would lie and play down any injuries or physical trauma so that I would not be prevented from competing.  I played pretty much every sport in high school, loved badminton, cycling and baseball, but it was TaeKwonDo that I dedicated my life to.  I earned a 1st degree black belt, and entered every competition I could - placing Second in the Provincials and bound for Nationals with a dream of the Olympics. Everything I was - was wrapped up in what I did - in training and competing.  I can not tell you how painful the transition out of that life was.  While I have not identified as a national level athlete for many years, I have still maintained a portion of my identity in athletics, that was until the ability to perform even adequately was slowly taken from me by injury.  Even now it is hard to be in Yoga class and not excel, but thankfully it is only a fleeting moment of self-deprecation.

I have come through a period of healing over the years that has helped me to realize that I am not what I do.  When I was employed with Wesley Acres, people would refer to me as Chapel Chick it was a title of honour, that in some ways became iconic, but it was not who I am.  The title of friend is also a title I value but even this does not define my identity.  Too often we subconsciously wrap ourselves up in what we do.  Great athletes, centre their life on the sport they excel at, writers on their latest best seller, painters on their most recent masterpiece, Musicians on the top charting song, Spouses on their marriage, Pastors on their role as shepherds, preachers by their sermons.  Other people find their identity in what they have, nice house, cars, popularity, fame fortune.

Here however is the truth - all those things, every single one of them, can be taken away from you, in fact one day they will be, one day we will be buried in the ground and we will no longer be able to maintain any of those titles or possessions.  If you do not know who you are outside of what you do, then you can not do your best.  If you do not know who you are outside of the accolades and  relationships you have with others, then you can not be your best.  If you do not know who you are apart from what you do, or what you have, then you do not know what it is to truly live - free & fulfilled.

When I lost my ability to train and compete, I lost a huge part of what I thought was my identity. I found out, years later, after a lot of painful and dangerous attempts of trying to define myself, who I really was.  I stepped into my true identity.  An identity that can never be taken from me, an identity that is not null and void at my death.  An identity that directs my life and gives it purpose and meaning.  An identity that has nothing to do with what I do, and everything to do with who I am.  I am a child of God - that is my identity and everything else pales in comparison. "I am not what I have. I am not what I do. I am not what people say about me. I am a beloved daughter of Christ." 

"For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He created us to be adopted as His sons and daughters through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will— to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given us in the One He loves. In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace that He lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding." ~Ephesians 1:3-8 

 

Whether you have come to realize it or accept it yet - that is your identity as well!  It is an incredibly freeing and fulfilling thing!  An identity not based on performance or possessions just love.  The fact that I was fearfully and wonderfully made by the creator of the universe is quite the distinction. He knew my identity before I was formed in my mother's wom, because He gave me my identity. "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." ~Psalm 139:13.  He loves me.  I know it sounds crazy - a little bible thumpy, but my life is a testament to the truth.  It's true, not simply because of what someone has told me to believe, or even what I have read, I am smarter, more discerning and stubborn than that. It is true becasuse it is what I have experienced.  It is true because God, in His love has made Himself incredibly real to me.  It began with searching and ended with an invitation too run straight towards my identity - right into the outrstretched arms of God.  When my performance and posessions fail me and others, I stand on the promise found in Psalm 73:25-26 "Whom have I in heaven but thee? My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever"

Follow the Music!

I was flipping through the channels the other night and stopped to watch a bit of the Grammy's and was reminded of how much I adore music.  I am incredibly envious (in the most Christian wasy possible) of those whom God has blessed with the gift of creating beautiful songs, melodies and harmonies

I love the arts.  I enjoy spending time in museums looking at paintings and sculpture, I like reading poetry and prose, getting lost in great literature, even pondering deep thoughts, presented in the pages of non-fiction. I relish the times when I get to pour myself into a painting, or when I can capture an image on film that speaks a thousand words, or when I can phrase a feeling just right so that it elicits an emotion in the heart of the reader.  However above all these things music is what speaks most profoundly to my heart.  If I could take any one thing on a deserted island with me, it would be a fully loaded I-pod (with the bible on it).   God speaks so powerfully to me, through the words and melodies of music and song (all genres).  I believe that music is a healing gift. To that end I would suggest that the world would be an incredibly more barren and destitute place of great moral depravity if it were not for God's gift of music. I would even argue that we would not live as long if our world was void of music and song. 

I quite agree and relate to Martin Luther who is quoted as saying "Music is an outstanding gift of God and next to theology, I would not give up my slight knowledge of music for a great consideration.  And youth should be taught this art; for it makes fine skillful people."~Martin Luther"

Music is a gift from God and has been an integral form of connection with God since the beginning of time.  In Job 38:7 God asks Job where were you when I created the world, "while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?" Music is a gift for God, an expression of the image of God within us, an offering of praise through song.  "Sing to the LORD a new song; sing to the LORD, all the earth." Psalm 96:1.  It is perhaps one of the greatest means by which we can adequately express the overwhelming emotion that fills our hearts, the conversation our spirit wants to have with our heavenly Father. I truly believe that God himself is speaking to us through the songs He inspires his children to write, (Secular and Christian). When I claim that music is a powerful form of healing, I mean it in the literal sense. Music ministers to a person's spirit, soul, mind and even body. It is well documented and has been proven scientifically that music has the ability to heal people. Music is by it's very nature divine. It is incapable of being touched, yet it touches everyone who is capable of hearing sounds. This healing can only be attributed to God. The music is delivered through man, but it is ultimately created by God

Someone once asked me if I had to make a choice would I choose to be blind or deaf.  That is such a difficult choice for me, as I love art and find so much beauty in God's creation.  I think, though that I would have to choose sound over sight.  Eyes can be a deceitful and prejudiced thing.  Perhaps without the use of sight, I would actually see more clearly, see things for what they truly are not blinded by the bias of what I see with my eyes, instead depending on listening to the heart.  As my hearing became more attuned without the use of sight, I might be able to hear from God more clearly and even hear the faint song of His creation as it sings its melody, even the sound of the stars singing [Job 38:7]

The following piece of prose, a favourite of mine, is a wonderful illustration of beauty, power and healing expressed through music:

For half a lifetime he wandered the empty night, alone and hopeless, until a simple melody pierced the darkness and caught his attention. Making the melody was a young man, a musician, with a sensitive ear, and an even more sensitive heart. The musician walked the same street, but he walked, not by sight, but by sound. As he encountered people he saw beyond their masks. He heard the sounds of their voices and felt the rhythm of their heartbeats. He saw each life as an instrument and within each heart a potential melody. And though one man hid behind his sunglasses, the musician heard his heart. Rather than trusting his vision, he used his music to pierce through the empty shell, and like the clapper in a church bell, encouraged the sound of love to ring out from the darkness.

As that love rang out, the musician was himself touched. He realized he could do more than just listen to the music of others -- he could do more than simply share a melody. With his sensitive ear, and his more sensitive heart, he could help tune other instruments and help other hearts make a melody. He discovered that a solitary note in a lightless reality could be added to his own, and two notes provide a wonderful harmony. They compliment each other. As the harmony grows, new notes are shared and in time a melody of praise and worship fills the air!

A solitary figure stumbling down a darkened street is replaced by two musicians dancing in the sunlight as the sound of their music drives away the darkness. They know their most significant achievement is their song. Sometimes their moving melodies diverge and at other times they are again rejoined in harmony. Sometimes the timing is out of sync and the notes are flat. There may be moments of discord, but the music continues and, with it, others draw near to listen. Soon, they also join in the song as each rings out in his own special way. In time, as each plays his part, the Composer's manuscript will be heard as he intended--as a grand symphony of Praise and Worship.

Take note when you can't see in the dark, you can follow the music!

Money May Come and Go but Integrity is Forever

Things do not seem to be as black and white as they were back in the day.  We live in a society crumbling in a torrent of moral decay.  When it comes to doing the right thing, there are now these levels of gray. 

I believe in integrity, the value of honesty, being upright and truthful. Our God is a God of honor and integrity, when He promises something He always delivers and we should strive to be like Him. Anything less than this is deceitful and wrong.  You may get away with something once, but you can be sure your sins will find you out.  "The integrity of the upright will guide them, but the perversity of the unfaithful will destroy them." ~ Proverbs 11:3.  While I am far from perfect and do not always make the best choices, God helping me, I try to live a life of integrity. I would much rather be guided by a conscious of integrity than destroyed by greed or living in the perversion of truth.

My integrity was recently put to the test.  Not by others, which would of course make the decision to do right quite easy, but instead I was tested in the cloak of secrecy where only I would be aware of the decision, held accountable only by my own conscious.  A true barometer of integrity is that which you do when no one else is looking and I was about to be measured.

I and a friend had the privilege of purchasing Christmas gift bags for the homeless this past December. We included Tim Horton Gift Certificates, Heat Packets, Wool Socks, Mitts, Hats, Toiletries etc.  In total we spent about $500.00 some of which was donated and receipts submitted and a portion of it which was personally contributed.  We spent $238.00 at this one store, getting a majority of the smaller items needed.  Once we had everything we went back to my place, and assembled the 20 gift bags.  A few weeks later, I was looking at my bank account transactions online and noticed that the $238.00 had indeed gone through as a debit, but then a separate transaction was completed immediately after it reversing the charges.  This was not an NSF, nor was it a Debit Error. The gift bags had all been given out, all the receipts for the purchases had been submitted by this time and accounted for.  I was not sure what to think, my first thought was that this was a great blessing, that perhaps the person behind us in line or the cashier had decided to donate the cost of the supplies.  I only say that because they had asked what we were buying all the items for and we had responded "to give to the homeless". 

I had talked to a few different people and asked them what there thoughts were, what would they do with the $238. Many replied take it as a blessing, a gift.  Nice thought - God knows I could use it - in fact an unexpected bill had gone through in the interim, that was covered as a result of that money being there.  If I am honest, for a moment, I did in fact consider keeping it. My heart however was not comfortable with this.  I decided I would wait to see if it was reversed at months end, by the bank or the store.  That has not transpired, so I am going to go back to the store, to try to find the specific cashier who served me (as I do not want them to get in trouble if it was an error) and let it be known what I have found and return the money.  Psalm 25:21 says "Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you".

It would be really easy to keep the money, and in fact I could use it, but the real cost of keeping it is more than I can afford. No matter how badly I could use the money, I know I must make every attempt to give it back. Failing that I think the next best thing is to spend it on additional items for the homeless, as that is what it was originally designated for. Money may come and go but integrity is forever "Better is the poor who walks in his integrity than one perverse in his ways, though he be rich" ~ Proverbs 28:6

Would You Rather Be Right or Do Right?

Tomorrow I am on my way to our pastors network retreat.  Part of the weekend includes a check-in time where we share and encourage each other as we reflect on where we currently find ourselves  A couple of the questions we are asked to consider are: What is God saying to me through His word, personally and through others and what am I doing or going to do about what He is saying?

I have been thinking this over for a few days now, and I am going to error on the side of vulnerability in this post.  While God is constantly drawing to my attention, areas in my life that I need to focus and work on, there has been one area specifically over the last little while that has been demanding more of my attention.

It is best summed up by the question a friend confronted me with earlier this week "Would you rather be right or do right?"  This was posed in response to my dissatisfaction and struggle with a situation. This one question however, strikes at the core of my hearts struggle.

My spirit rises up at injustice.  I have always had a very strong sense of right & wrong.  While I am far from perfect and struggle like everyone else to live a righteous life, my conscious is very tender and I am keenly aware of when I am doing wrong. I have very high expectations of myself and others who claim to follow Jesus, and as a result I can sadly, be very judgmental of Christians. I expect people to know and act accordingly, to use common "Christian sense", especially when it comes to loving God and others and being a person of integrity.

So answering the question honestly, I am growing weary of doing right at the sacrifice of being right. Sometimes I just want to stand up and fight and be right, so that others might be held accountable to start doing right.  Here, however are the struggles I face in deciding whether to do right or be right:

1) Knowing what is the right thing to do is a struggle in and of its self. Could it not be that sometimes the right thing to do is to in fact "be right"? What I mean by this is perhaps at times, doing right does not mean, doing what will enable others to continue in their misguided ways, but to stand up and speak out - to fight for what is right-despite the fact that it may cause some turmoil, hurt hearts and chaos.  Again I point to the examples of Martin Luther King, Ghandi etc.

2) When I do choose to "Do Right" instead of "Be Right" I am sometimes left with feelings of resentment and bitterness thinking that the situation has been left unresolved, injustice allowed to fester. Here is what God has been revealing to me personally, through others and His word.  I am not the corrector of wrongs, the outcome of any situation is ultimately not in my hands.  God is judge, and He will bring about justice and should He choose to use me to bring about justice, He will make that abundantly clear, providing opportunities to do so. Proverbs 20:22 reads "Do not say 'I'll get you back for this wrong!' Wait for the Lord and He will deliver You" Justice is not ours to carry out it is the Lord's. 

3) What if I am convinced that I am right - only to find out in the end I am wrong. I am not God, so who I am to assume I even know what is right.  Of course common sense, discernment, wisdom and wise Christian council go a long way to ensuring any of us are not rogue vigilante's. The danger however lies not in what we know but in what we don't know. Only God knows the beginning from the end, the heart and motives, right and wrong.

4) Lack of trust, ungodly control and perhaps pride are the struggles that I really need to face in order to overcome the desire at times to be right.

So what am I going to do about all this?  God helping me, I am going to keep a positive attitude, continuing to focus first on doing right by God then by others but with a glad heart. I am going to address the specks in my own eyes. Most importantly I am going to pray through every situation, trusting that God is in control.  He is a God of justice and really doesn't need or want me getting in the way.  He will deal with each situation, as need be, and in the end Justice will prevail. I am going to let go and let God. Stop trying to do it my way and let God lead, obedient to step up and speak out if He is so calls me to. Wow what a load off my shoulders, one that I was never meant to be placed there in the first place.

To this end I recently set aside the need to be right and have it acknowledged that I was wronged in a personal situation.  Instead I am committed to doing right - because that is the right thing to do for all involved. I can say that it was indeed a liberating experience, that I hope to continue in all areas of my life for all the days to come.

God's word and good advice has satisfied my soul saying "Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap, if we do not grow weary" Galatians 6:0 

DO RIGHT and YOU WILL BE RIGHT

Apathy Will Be the Death of You and Me

I had prepared a sermon for this morning's service, but over the course of the 48 hour prayer weekend, I really felt like I was to wait, that today was not the day to present this particular message. Instead I preached on forgiveness, and included the Poetry Slam I wrote. I had made my senior pastor aware of my decision, and of course he encouraged me to continue as I felt led. As I prepared to go to the pulpit, I looked around and noticed more young adults in our congregation than usual, and knew that this was the right message for this day. My senior pastor commented as well, on the perhaps not so coincidental change in the mornings plans considering the demographic of the church community this morning.

The message I had originally prepared and will be delivering at another time, developed from a time of prayer with God where I was questioning Him about the church, which resulted in the book of Haggai being impressed upon me. I have read that book at least 30 times over the past month, as it was such a powerful and direct answer to my inquiries.

I'm obviously not going to post my message here, before I present it at the church, but I thought I would summarize the book of Haggai, and an analogy I drew from it.

Apathy will be the death of you and me. 16 years later the people of Judah still hadn’t finished what they started - the Temple. They had taken their eyes off the goal, their eyes off God and had slid into a lifestyle of complacency and apathy. Haggai was compelled by the Lord to reveal to the Judeans the consequences of obedience and disobedience to the Lord, as it pertained especially to the building of His temple.

The people of Judah had not made the construction of the temple their priority; they had not put God first in their lives. They had allowed their self-centeredness and me first attitudes to drive them into an environment of complacency and apathy. Their homes had taken precedence over the temple [1:4], their interests, over the interests of God. Haggai was intent on getting them re-focused on God, the task He had provided them to do – and back on the right track as a people serving Yahweh.

The Judeans were called by Haggai to evaluate where it was they were headed, to “give careful thought to their ways” [1:5], it reminded me of a line I have heard from Dr. Phil “How is that working for you?” Haggai was saying in essence take a look around, all the things you have placed your efforts in, how are they paying off for you; not well as we can establish from verse 1:6 “You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it” We can put our efforts into all our own self-interests but if it is not of God it will amount to nothing. “You expected much, but see, it turned out to be little. What you brought home, I blew away.” [1:9]

God using him, Haggai stepped in and spoke up, with clarity and insight.  The word of the Lord stirred their spirits and renewed their commitment to God and His purposes. Where rebuke had birthed repentance, now reassurance would birth encouragement and strength in the Lord. “But now be strong…and work for I am with you, declares the Lord almighty” [2:4]

The call to build the temple could also serve as an allegory for us as individuals and the body of Christ. We sometimes neglect the spiritual work that needs to be tended to in our lives, the building up of our spiritual fortitude, instead focusing on more pleasurable or immediate attentions, such as our work, popularity, success, friendships etc. etc. We focus so much on getting ahead, to the neglect of our spiritual walk, and then wonder why we are progressing so slowly.  It's either ignorance or apathy.  Either we don't care or don't understand that if we tended to our spiritual lives, and relationship with God first, maintaining our focus and priority in Him, then everything else would fall into place as per God’s will.

We Are Family

It is only fitting that today's blog should concern the privilege I've had of participating in this weekend's 48 hour prayer vigil.  "Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray, and cry aloud: and he shall hear my voice." ~ Psalm 55:17.   While one might think I would choose to write something on prayer, I am more interested in sharing what I witnessed of Koinonia over the past 34 hours.  This will post will probably go through a couple revisions, as I am writing this eyes half open.

It delights my heart to see the body of Christ serving in unity and love.  Admittedly the body of Christ, doesn't always function as it should.   At times we are a clanging gong of dysfunction rather than a harmonious symphony following the lead of the master conductor.  As it is with any family, the family of God,  is going to experience some dysfunction, and growing pains, as we work together under the authority of our heavenly Father.  However, when  brothers and sisters, related through the blood of Christ place their focus on the things of God, becoming unified in the things which please Him, we become a glorifying force for God, an unstoppable power in the Kingdom and a blessing to others.  That was the result this past weekend.

Koinonia is a Greek word that means "communion by intimate participation".  The feeling of family was palpable this weekend as people came together for the common goal of prayer centered on God and focused on others.  All those who joined together for the 48 hour prayer vigil experienced this communion as we took the personal requests of friends and strangers to the Lord. There is something about sharing in the deepest needs and hurts and desires of individuals that creates a familial intimacy and trust.

"But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it." ~ 1 Corinthians 12:24-26

There are number of reasons why I think the essence of family was so evident this weekend.  We were focused on a common goal, that had little do with ourselves and everything to do with  God and others. It was a challenge bigger than just one person, which required the participation and cooperation of many if we were going to succeed.   Any brokenness or divisiveness gave way as we became closely intertwined in this common goal. The spirit of sharing, generosity and mutual support became tangible.

A few of my favourite moments from the weekend:

I) The fact that people showed up every hour, even the wee small hours of the morning to pray for the needs of others.  Individuals took it upon themselves to call participants to remind them of their prayer time.  If someone was late arriving or could not make it, someone else stepped in to ensure that time slot was filled.  Not to mention those who decided last minute to stop by and join in prayer.

II) Witnessing the body of believers minister to each other, praying with and for one another, sharing tears, laughter and hugs.

III) The unexpected opportunities I was afforded to get to know individuals better, and pray for them.

IV) The variety of ways people prayed, some in silence, others out loud, some with song, some journaling, while others prayed the word.

V) Most generations of our church family were represented from the aged to the young.  I can not adequately express the emotion that filled my heart, as I observed one university student who took time out of her day to come and pray, quietly pour over each request. Admiration, Inspiration and hope I think best defines what I was feeling.

VI) The praise wall, that gave the glory and credit to God!

VII) The generosity extended beyond prayers, and beyond our Christian community when an individual brought a donation of a bag full of heat packs, wool socks and chocolate bars for me to take to the street truck tonight.

VIII) On a personal note, concerning sharing and generosity, I was pleasantly surprised to receive a slice of delicious home made banana bread Saturday morning and incomparable authentic homemade Indian Food brought for supper Saturday night.

This weekend is best summed up by this statement made to me Friday evening: "What an encouragement and privilege it was to be be able to come and pray for others and a humbling experience to walk around the sanctuary praying for all those needs"

The simplest and purest things are what I value the most!  My heart at times was bursting with delight.  I am blessed to be a part of the body of Christ, and uber blessed to be a member of this church family!

Consider Our Ways...

I have the privilege of facilitating a 48 hour prayer vigil this weekend at church.  While I was praying, I became distracted by the sound of the cars going by, which got me thinking and in turn inspired this - my 2nd attempt at poetry slam. Perhaps I`ll attempt to write one a week, but we`ll see how it goes. I could definitely use the practice. This is a spoken word art form, so a little is lost when it is read rather than heard. 

CONSIDER OUR WAYS...
I hear the cars driving by, whizzing, streaming by and I wonder why, they never stop to look inside - this sanctuary. Is it scary? Or is there something more ominous looming? Like the possibility that we are not choosing - to go beyond these stained glass walls to where it is dirty, messy and Jesus calls, us to start leading people out of the darkness, pulling them out of the muck and mire. Cause perhaps we're to concerned that it may ruin our image, mess up our attire.

You can debate me on this, argue that it's not the case but given the evidence or lack there of could you look me in the face. When people are lost more than ever before, many never having even darkened a church door. When there is so much space in this sacred place, full of empty pews and seats - tell me where is all the "Fresh Meat". I'll tell you where it is - in the world rotting away, unaware of their spirits decay, all because our fear or selfishness keeps us away.

Don't blame it on God when He has called you to get out of your pew, to start putting others ahead of you. There are people in Darfur dying, children crying, homeless people sleeping on the street, nations with nothing to eat. So many of God's children oppressed. this world is a mess. Yet we sit back and say it ain't our fault, wondering why the dark is so dark - pitch black like a moonless night. The question worth asking is why is our light not so bright.

Blood stained sacrifice paid the price - Do we honour the cost? When our inaction seems to indicate that we don't really care about the lost. Do we even care to bring them inside - this place where we hide? Or are we embarrassed and ashamed that our church is not all that we've claimed. Maybe we will recognize the error of all that we've been doing, building palaces for ourselves, while God's temple inside our hearts lies in ruins.

I don't mean to rant or come down to hard, my intention is not to have you leaving here emotionally scared - but if you are getting a little offended -then perhaps your heart needs to be mended. Maybe this Def Jam Slam was meant for you, because God has powerful, incredible things for you to do. Don't pack your bags, I'm not sending you on a guilt trip. These words are meant to challenge and edify the church not break the spirits of the saints like a whip. I am there with you, trying to get it right, considering my ways and how to brighten the light within me so that others can see when I venture into the dark, someting worth having, a spark, that will ignite a desire to know of God and his refining fire. Let's consider our ways and how to ensure this is a place of God's glory, where people come and sing praises, sharing their own story - Of how God's servants came blazing bright, leading them out of the darkness and into the light.

And He Will...

Last night in small group, Jenn shared a few of her favourite verses from Psalm 37 as an encouragement to us all. I decided to re-read that Psalm in full tonight. My heart resonated with much of what I read but it was verses 3-8 and 24-25, that I decided to spend time reflecting on.

The Psalms are written in such a way that they are meant to be felt with the heart more than analyzed by the mind. Whether it be a Psalm of praise or complaint, a plea for help, or a psalm of thanksgiving, you can't help but be moved by the laments or comforted and encouraged by the faithfulness of God. You can see woven through the pages of the Psalms the theme of obedience begetting blessing and disobedience bringing rebuke and judgment. I love the cause and effect relationship that is established in this Psalm, the faithfulness of God and His promises to those who follow in His ways.

"Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this: He will make your righteousness like the noon day sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him, do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret - it only leads to evil. ...If the Lord delights in a man's way, He makes his steps firm; though He stumble; He will not fall for the Lord upholds him with His hand."

So often I hear people say that the Lord will give you the desires of your heart; Yet too often it is misapplied, in attempts to sanctify our own current yearnings. Verse 4 reads "delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart" It is when we turn our eyes upon God, when we draw so near to Him that our heart echoes His heart, when our desires align with God's desires, because we delight in the Lord and the things in which the Lord delights, that we are granted the desires of our heart. These are the desires that we truly long for, desires that will ultimately bring us fulfillment and joy, blessing others and glorifying God.

Come Together Right Now...

I have always been a big proponent of small groups and that passion has only been fuelled by the amazing group I am a part of.  If I was to define our group in three words I would describe it as "Organically Christ-like".   It is organic, by nature of its creation.  A friend and I were looking around for a good bible study group, going church to church trying to find a place that would meet our needs.  When nothing really fit, we thought to ourselves, why don't we start out own.  So we did.  It is not a big group just the 4 of us, which is twice as many indicated in Matthew 18:20 "Where two or more are gathered in my name, I [Jesus] am there among them." We are all from different churches, some of us strangers at the beginning but now friends. The fabulous thing is that we are different enough to compliment and challenge one another but we share some things in common.  We are all accomplished women, aged 26-34, independent, intelligent, and in relatively the same stage of life.  

Our small group is Christ-Like in that we watch over each other in love. We are transparent with each other, open with our struggles, we share our pains, discouragement and frustrations, as well as our dreams and victories.  We hold one another accountable and encourage and challenge each other.  When we meet formally each Wednesday, we are in God's word, learning how to live like Christ in the middle of our circumstances.  We always pray for and with each other, giving thanks to God and seeking His guidance and help to live lives that will glorify Him and bless others. 

I love this group, because it represents what I believe to be one of the most integral cogs in the life of a healthy church and a necessity in the life of each person wanting to grow in their spiritual walk. A safe place where we can confess our sin struggles. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. ~James 5:16. Real - authentic - transparent individuals, centred in Christ but imperfect and aware of it. It is a group where we have developed relationships allowing each other to speak into our lives about the sin that we can't even see. Encouraging and challenging one another as we seek to be more like Him. A safe place to be broken, a great place to find healing, learning together what it means to live as Christ has called us to live, nurturing each other in faith, hope and love through relationships of mutual accountability.

Jesus devoted himself to a small group at the beginning of His ministry, consisting of 12 ordinary men who became His disciples.  The words of Jesus in Luke 22:28 reveals the need for human fellowship and support "You are those who have stood by me in my trials."  The early church was a small group of people that gathered to encourage and support one another, doing essentially the same thing our small group did tonight, meeting in a home, eating together and praising God.  The Methodist revival led by John Wesley was primarily based on the use of small groups for mutual confession to one another, to give encouragement and support in overcoming temptation and in developing a Christian style of life.

I am passionate about small groups because I believe that a lack of relationship in the church and/or one's life contributes significantly to a loss of spiritual vitality.  If you are feeling drained, unsupported, and struggling in your Christian walk, or you simply want to be challenged and encouraged, I would encourage you to find a solid small group or consider helping to initiate one. We would all do well to recover accountability and authenticity in the real and deep manner in which Jesus exampled it amongst His disciples, increasing the relationships amongst the body of Christ and helping one another to grow more in His image.